Dear Haruna,
I got married precisely two months ago. I looked forward to marital bliss, but with the look of things, I don’t think it is possible.

I am Igbo, while my husband is Yoruba; we love each other, but his mother is fast becoming a source of worry for me.
She stayed back after our wedding, I have nothing against her staying back or staying permanently with us if she chose to, but mama wouldn’t let me be.
She finds faults with everything I do and she is fond of complaining and getting at me when my husband is not at home.
Whenever my husband is home, she would pretend that she really likes me. I am very confused. Mama will spend minutes on phone talking with her people about me; she doesn’t even care if I understood Yoruba language at all.
I think it is too early for me to complain and I don’t want to create a negative impression about myself with my husband.
Please, how can I handle this before the situation gets out of hand?
Ndidi.

Dear Ndidi,
I appreciate your concern and the fact that you don’t want to cause any ripple in your home. It rather early.
Please, be patient and put her in your mother’s place. Treat her like you would treat your mother. Be patient with her and please ignore her excesses. The fact that she does all you have alleged when her son is away means she is mischievous.
You must realise that age sometimes does not determine maturity. If you answer her or react, you would be descending to her level and she would have achieved her aim. The best treatment you can give her is silence. This will also give you peace of mind. I am sure she wouldn’t be staying forever, tolerate her for as long as it takes. You are also right; do not discuss this with your husband for now. It is rather early. You also need to be very prayerful. Ask God particularly for divine patience. It is well with you.