Meanwhile, all movement was grounded at the airport because of what was tagged “Presidential Movement”. Passengers experienced delays because the President had to get his drink on board. Many insiders say the penchant for alcohol also accounts for the nonchalant attitude the President exhibits during periods of national loss.

LONDON: At the Conference Hall of the Prestigious Luxury Park Lane Hotel, the CEOs of the top investment banks in the world gathered for an Investment Summit put together by the Federal Government of Nigeria. The CEOs of the crème de la crème of investments were all there- Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, JPMorgan Chase, Merrill Lynch, Deutsche Bank, Citigroup, Credit Suisse and Barclays Capital.

They all waited for President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan to address them, but all to no avail. Upstairs, at the Presidential Suite, Mr. President laid wasted. The night before, he had over indulged in a heavy party with the Petroleum Minister, Mrs. Dizeani, until the early hours of morning. He drank himself to stupor and was vomiting and stooling through out the night. Doctors came in but could not bring him into any shape to attend the Investment Meeting without embarrassing Nigeria. So, the President did not turn up for the Investment Meeting that the FG had spent almost five hundred thousand Great Britain Pounds organising. The CEOs were greatly disappointed.

The President’s no-show on account of his being drunk is legendary. He missed an important summit for investors in Australia lying wasted in his presidential suite. He missed his speech at the African Union Summit in Addis Ababa because he was drunk. A presidential aide remarked:

“The President has adopted a wrong leadership style; his drinking habits makes him start drinking exotic alcoholic drinks from 2:00 pm, abandoning all official assignments for his ministers, especially that of Petroleum and Finance. The high budget for feeding in the Presidency can also be tied to this habit.”

The source went further to state, “President Jonathan’s aides called “The advance team” usually transport alcoholic drinks for him during times he is traveling on official duties.”

One of Nigeria’s oil magnates recounted how the President’s Aircraft waited at the Murtala Muhammed Airport for over one and half hours for him to get through Lagos traffic and hand him some bottles of the vintage J&B Blended Scotch Whisky. Meanwhile, all movement was grounded at the airport because of what was tagged “Presidential Movement”. Passengers experienced delays because the President had to get his drink on board. Many insiders say the penchant for alcohol also accounts for the nonchalant attitude the President exhibits during periods of national loss such as the several bombings and deaths in the North.

Many analysts say the President’s love for drink impairs his ability to decide, leaving governance unattended. They posit that another four years of a drinking President could spell doom for our economy. At a time when oil has crashed, the Naira experiencing a free fall, workers getting sacked, this addiction to alcohol will certainly be the final undoing for this great country.

Nigeria does not at this time need a drinking president.

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The writer of this piece pleaded for anonymity